Friday – this week I am grateful for …

It has been a big week. A huge week. A bigger than Ben Hur week.

It was my birthday. I had my lovely amazing surprise dinner and then my lovely three course extravaganza birthday dinner. I had coffee dates, play dates, bookclub and more socialising than I knew what to do with. And I am grateful for all of it. For the delicious food, for the sparkling company, for my little boy. For the French champagne. Are you still with me or have you drifted off into the land of trite??? Because that what it felt like when I tried to write (more) about it. Trite pappy gratitude. This week was filled with gratitude for my friends and Robert. I was extremely pleased and I did feel loved and special. I also felt fake writing about it. I have instead, tried to write about what I really felt this week. Glad that it is not last year. Glad that this year’s birthday was nothing like the last. Glad that I have had a chance to reflect. (And I have had a little wallow too. When I have edited and edited and edited, you may even get to read about it.)

everything's peachy

But enough of that, on with the gratitude …

What I am actually grateful for this week is that everything is working out. My life has improved since last birthday. I used the opportunity of my birthday to re-evaluate, as I always do. How’s it all going? Making any progress? At first I was disheartened. Nothing much to report.

I recalled, in detail, my last birthday. I started to write about it. I had to stop writing about it. Too bleak without context. Not suited to a ‘naked’ post. It will need much editing and a lot of placement and context. Any improvements? Well I understood from simply thinking about that day a year ago, how much alteration had taken place. I am not that person now.

The person I am now does not have most of her child’s first year ahead of her. She does not have the eczema and allergies diagnoses to live through. She doesn’t have to complete paperwork for Centrelink. She doesn’t have to get up twice a night, every night. She doesn’t have a looming legal matter. She doesn’t have to figure out how to breastfeed in public. She doesn’t have to worry about losing her mind. All these things are behind the person I am now, and for that I am grateful.