2 Aug 2012
It is Friday again tomorrow. I will be going to work, again.
The full time working gig is still in progress. There is still another week to go.
So far the tally is one last kid at child care pick up, two blackouts, three lots of takeaway, four million coffees and about fifty seven personal freak out moments, and one shamefully self-indulgent cry-baby melt-down about stationery (yes really). I have spent the month at the very bleeding edge of my comfort zone. For me work is all about competence. Actually my whole life is about competence. I like, no I love, being good at stuff. I hate feeling less than on top of my existence. Feeling like I know what is happening, what I need to do, what is expected, who everyone is, what they know and how to get stuff done. That’s my comfort zone, that’s what I like.
When stepping into someone else’s job in an organisation not my own, I have none of these things. I have my inbuilt qualities, my learned patterns, work experience, personal traits; but little of the complete competence which I like to always show the world. There is no time to learn how, there is only action and completion of tasks. There is no time to find out the history, work with the issues, there is only one option, just do it. And then do some more and then on top of all that doing, the phone will not stop and email will flood in and it will only sometimes make any sense and yet, I have to write, well, and quickly and check other people’s writing. And talk about issues, with command of detail on topics I have only had the merest whiff of a briefing on in passing while in the lift on the way to the meeting, where I will be doing the talking.
And the part I actually like about all this, is that everyone knows who I am, but I have only a hint of who they all are. Makes it simpler. At least the confusion is only in one direction. They know what I can do for them. At least for the short time I will be there.
It has been testing. I have flexed all my emotional intelligence. I have been exercising the full extent of my capabilities. Using skills I have been in touch with for a few years at least. And I am better for it.
What do you like to be good at?